This was the week I learned to use a snow blower. I know, it’s not glamorous or maybe even interesting. It’s just a snow blower. But it’s so much more than that too.

I’ve been living on my own since the fall of 2018. For more than five years I have been doing my best to run a house without a man, like every good feminist should be able to do. But I’ll be honest, I’m not the most handy or coordinated person so it ain’t easy. There have been many times in the last five years I have joked about needing a hired husband for help around the house.

But this week, I used my snow blower, all by myself.

(Take note: Over the holidays I was told I should have my ex over to show me how to use it, and bless him his response was “I’ve never used a snow blower”).

I’ll admit, I didn’t want to do it. I didn’t want to read the instruction manual. I didn’t want to go get gas in my little jerry can. I didn’t want to figure out how to start it. Nope, nope, nope. But I had committed to lowering my winter expenses by buying a snow blower instead of paying each year for someone to plow the driveway. The snow blower is a symbol of responsible adulting.

It’s also, at least in my possession, a symbol of feminist independence.

So, let’s get real here, I did send a text to one of my dearest men seeking some encouragement but all I needed from him was “you got this” and “watch a youtube video”. Thank goodness for YouTube videos.

We had two major storms this week so in the last 7 days I have gone from “I don’t even know how to start this thing” to “hey look, my driveway is clear!” I mean ya, it took a while for me to figure out the choke and I haven’t taken it past 3rd gear yet. I learned that it barely works if the snow is really wet and yesterday at one point I thought the whole thing was going to fall over when it got stuck a little vertical on a snowbank. I’m no snow blowing superstar, really, but my driveway is clear and I did it all by myself.

Not to say I’m totally giving up on the hired husband idea but I’m a proud, independent feminist today. Just don’t come over because after all the snow blowing, I didn’t have the energy to shovel the steps for visitors. This feminist has limits, and still wants snowy days to be about reading and jigsaw puzzles.

Parrish Wilson, lies on a grey couch with her head propped up on her arm while looking at the camera.

Parrish Wilson is a writer and writing therapist. She supports her clients to process life and all it’s complexities through the written word. Check out her membership program, The Mental Health Creative, for monthly guided writing workshops and a creative, heart-centered community.